It's been quite some thing since I blogged properly, but seriously, there isn't much to write about. I mean, it's just school, yeah. And I'm certainly past the age where I should be whining about homework and mean mean meannnnn teachers that give too much homework which I am STILL neglecting to do until the last possible minute.

Math lessons are like... so unchanged. I mean, I sit near the back of the class, the teacher drones on, I do my homework for other subjects in a frenzy because it's the next lesson and only look up from time to time or when my name is called. Familiar scene, no? I practically did this since sec 1 or something, haha. Some things just don't change, I guess.

Apparently, I'm also involved in a Track & Field event and NDP cheerleading stint in which I have to assume temporary insanity when I somehow coerced myself into joining. Seriously, I DIDN'T know just what the heck I was thinking when I signed up for these.

Life's still pretty normal, I get up, go to school, prepare to stay awake in classes and go home and slack before my laptop. Typical day at Kranji Anderson. See, interchangable.

As for friends, well, that's also pretty normal, my classmates are pretty friendly, and you know me, very... indifferent anyway. I just don't always act the usual way that I am... just more reserved and polite. Yeah. To judge how I feel about someone, it's always easier to see how nicely or rudely I treat them.

Hmm, in other news, I'm sort of interested in taking up a translating post at Hochuuami, translating chinese manga to english. Okay, so I'm not exactly brilliant at chinese, but even at my standard, manga is like... still relatively easy... My main point is to try it out, working with other like minded people, *cough cough*. Never mind.

Labels: life, random

To be perfectly truthful, I'm a passive person, to a fault that you won't see me asserting much of anything. If something pisses me off, I'll just either shrug it off or swear until my temper cools. When it comes to making decisions, I usually just go with the flow, or ask for someone else's opinion. Even when I seriously want something, I'll just get it myself or be content with a substitute.

But now... I don't know, it's not like my life's terrible now or something, but somehow, I'm just not happy with where my life is going. Just what major decisions in my life wasn't decided by someone else?

I want to change. I don't like the me now.

I'm afraid that ten years down the road, I might just regret letting other people run my life for me. Just because I don't want conflicts, just because I'm lazy, just because I want to be liked.

Okay, so I know I said so many times that I want to change. Yet I didn't. I hope it isn't too late yet. And sometimes I just wish I had the courage to yell at my mother coherently and tell her, 'Hey, fuck that. This is my life. I want to make my own decisions, and make stupid mistakes. Stop telling me what to do.' But... everything goes to pieces before I even get the nerve to say anything because my mouth doesn't cooperate with my brain. And I can't even stay mad at her.

But I know if she continues to run my life, there will be no turning back. Because no matter how much I try to put myself in her shoes, I will resent her. And I will hate.

Why am I such a frigging coward? I rather be a scary bitch and be hated universally then hating myself inside when I find myself so confined.

Labels: freetalk, life

Spent an entire day (okay, not really the entire day but a better portion of the day) at the library. Basically I just collected a bunch of moderately interesting books (in my opinion) and sat down and read. And read some more.

I was actually hoping to read up more on interior design because I want to redo my rooms and was thinking of what to paint for my dull, dull walls. Currently am thinking of a deep green, with black and silver. Slytherin colors. (:

But couldn't find anything decent... or was I in the wrong area? Probably so, but I was too lazy to move around much when I'm carrying like 10 books at a shot. People probably think I'm super kiasu or something... But if one looks closely, I'm like carrying 1 book on 1 subject, excluding the fiction.

Ended up reading about dreams because I have been plagued by stupid nightmares that set off my mother's worry instincts... besides, lucid dreaming has been something that I wanted to achieve since like forever. Okay, the age of five.

Then I tried researching on geniuses and how they were made, but because I suck, I couldn't find anything conclusive. Sorry, Hiroya. Guess you have to be fine-tuned longer. But hey, reading on IQ is sort of cool. I mean, the extent of Nazi cruelty... they sort of... sterilized people that they found were feeble-minded and basically shipped them off to a place and made them work... if they were unable to function 'properly' they were sent off to be killed. IQ tests were are also damn important to the rich in America, or perhaps, everywhere. Kids as young as four have to get tested before they are considered for enrollment in the top preschools... is there even a need?!

And because the library needs more books, I couldn't find anything, anything useful on Aztec mythology. Yes, that's the next mythology I want to conquer. Not that I'm actually done with Greek/Roman/Norse/Egyptian. But I do know more than the common layman. Right.

Not to sound totally random but handwriting analysis is actually pretty damn accurate. For me, at least, since I never tried it on others, or even speak of it. My clique probably aren't into that sort of thing.

Anyway, I didn't borrow everything that I wanted to... first, Mark Haddon's Spot of Bother wasn't available for loan yet and I couldn't find Linda Grant's The Clothes on their Backs. The only bright spot was that I found Ben Okri's Starbook, but it wasn't really something that I wanted to sink my claws in...

Oh well. I shall make sure to put down more 'me' time. And the next time, I want to sit in a cafe and drink overpriced coffee all by myself as I write. Though I doubt I'll actually do it. Because of the overpriced coffee. >.>

Labels: life, mood, random

Right, went to work because the thrice-damned staff at Robinsons was mean enough to demand that all promoters MUST turn up for work, or they'll un-display their shoes. Meaning that their company would not earn money then.

Robinsons closed at 6, giving me enough time to reach my aunt's house for the reunion dinner. It was a noisy enough affair, but hardly entertaining to me. Probably because the closest person to my age is my brother. My second brother had opted out of the dinner to go dating... Yeah, that sounds about fair.

Went home only at around 10... but we only live like 20 minutes away, so... nah, not much of a big deal.

Labels: family, life

I read this post over at Primordial blog, and I sort of remembered something that I read from a book when I was at Kino, a few days back.

A young man speaks to the priest, in hopes to seek the presence of the Goddess. The priest advises him to pray and meditate in order to achieve his goal.

He follows the priest's instructions and bows his head obediently. He thinks to himself, "Oh Goddess, let me hear you so as to follow your path." Above him, the sky rumbles as thunder resounded loudly. The young man dismisses it as merely noise and continues praying, hurt that his pleads were not answered.

And so he prays, "Oh Goddess, let me taste your powers as you render the earth to your will." Rain pelted him from the clouds but he ignored the droplets, brushing them away irritatedly.

He prays again, "Oh Goddess, won't you let me see you?" And next to him, a tiny egg cracks open and a small beak pops out, breaking the shell further as it makes its way out into the world. Yet, the young man takes no notice, so blinded is he to the world.

The young man tries again, "Goddess, won't you touch me and show me your presence?" Just this moment, a butterfly rests against his hand, perching delicately. But once again, the young man cared not, for this beautiful creature, and swatted his hand to shoo it away.

Feeling that the entire day was a wasted experience, the young man goes back to the priest. "I have mediated and prayed for long, yet I have seen no sign of the Goddess."

The priest looks at him with just a hint of pity in his eyes, "Child, you have been an unseeing fool. Did you not hear and feel the power of the Goddess through the rain, showering the earth with the essence of life? Did you not see a miracle that unfolded before you as the chick begins its life? And the butterfly that you swatted away, was it not the Goddess that caressed you so gently? Miracles, no matter how small, are miracles. If you look, you will see the Goddess' hand in so much and more."

After reading this, I feel that this is a sort of wake up call for me. My own gift from the Goddess? Maybe. Perhaps it is time that I do more instead of skipping rituals for selfish reasons.

Labels: life, wicca

... Or so the saying goes. But the prevention hurts too. I hate needles. Seriously, needles and I just don't go too well with each other. It's not the pain really, cause there are certain kinds of pain that I welcome, like those muscle pains after exercise, those fine lines between pleasure and pain thing that emos/poets like to talk about. But needles? Please get the fuck away from me.

Refer to here if you have like no clue what on earth am I talking about.
So yeah, first shot of three done today.
The next shot would be on the 18th of Feb
And the last would be 6 months from now.
And 3 months later from then I need to do another blood test.
Ouch.
And the gigantic hole in my wallet. *sob*

(you know... all the talking about shots, make me feel as if I'm some sort of a rabid pet...)

Labels: life

Blah. Apparently the doctors are hard workers. Because my blood test results are in. UNFORTUNATELY, I don't seem to have the... erm... needed anti-whatever that prevents me from getting nasty diseases like... erm... whatever. See, I so CANNOT be a doctor or anyone in the medical field. So that means that I need to take 3 INJECTIONS. Oh shoot. There goes my salary. What a meaningful way to spend my precious hard earned money. Way blah, I tell you.

Apparently I have Type A+ blood, which may or may not be rare. Because my father and I are the only ones in the family to hold this blood type. The others are all boring Type O. According to Japanese Blood Type Personality:


Type A

People with blood type A have a deep-rooted strength that helps them stay calm in a crisis when everyone else is panicking. However, they tend to avoid confrontation, and feel very uncomfortable around people. A types are shy and sometimes withdrawn. They seek harmony and are very polite, but all the same feel that they never really fit in with others. A types are very responsible. If there is a job to be done, they prefer to take care of it themselves. These people crave success and are perfectionists. They are also very creative, and the most artistic of all the blood types, most likely because of their sensitivity.
People with blood type A are also likely to be considered classic "type A's": stressed and conscientious. May be Pessimistic. Value relationships and are loyal. Hesitant to change. Nature lovers and dislike crowds - need a private place or secret hideaway. Can be indecisive. Good at team work and obey rules. Dislike to touch or be touched by others.
The Third Hokage, Haruno Sakura, Hotohori, Heero Yui, Keiko (Kayko) Yukimura

Famous A’s
Adolf Hitler, George Bush Senior, Soseki Natsume, Ringo Starr, Britney Spears

Not exactly all accurate... because I'm sooo not stressed or conscientious. Haha, I'm damn lazy. And am no perfectionist. And Brit's an A too... gee, will I end up like her? That's pretty sad though...

Labels: life, random

Knackered completely, the only thing I want to do is to sink onto a comfortable chair and never get up again. Okay, I exaggerated. I'm not that tired, but only by a margin. Anyway, yeah, today was the 'glorious' first day of work in which I felt like a complete idiot as I stutter my way through questions and could only look blank when I'm asked for something not in my field of current knowledge. Yes, this mooching slacker has gotten herself a job. Not a very good job though it does pay. What am I do? Selling shoes. Glamourous job, no? (rolls eyes)

They call it a promoter, but I felt more like a glorified shoe fetcher. Other than fetching shoes and occasionally answering queries, I was apparently only required to stand around and look pretty. Blah. And we're not allowed to sit or slouch... it would be a total killer for my legs, to stand around for seven hours straight, were it not for my fellow ally, Ain, who told me funny stories about silly customers that had stupid written across their faces, taught me how to slack while pretending to work so that the bosses don't get prissy. She appears to be only slightly older than me, though I didn't ask because... it just didn't seem right. Oh well. I'm not exactly a social person. But she's cool, as in she's just about as sarcastic as I can be. (:

And I now can add another 'Aishah' to the list of them that I know. It's too common a name already... though I don't really know her as she's not around my area most of the time. And apparently, the music in the store loops all the time because she can lipsync/dance to all the songs with a 95% accuracy. By the time I ended work, I have already listened to 'Smack That' almost 5, 6 times.

Work would have been more bearable if there had been any good-looking guys, but sadly, if there were any, they eluded me... there was this one who was quite cute, with his dimples and quick smile. But... he seemed too old... I guess that he's probably nearing or is in his 20s. So yeah, no interest.

If you think women are fussy, think again. I sell men's shoes, and trust me, men are way pickier than their female counterparts when buying shoes, and the price of one regular men's shoes, a woman can get two or three pairs for that same price. And men have more problems when buying shoes...

Customer (male): The problem with these shoes are because they are too narrow at the sides, see, my feet are broad here (points to ugly feet)
Me: ... I'm sorry for that, sir. Would you like to look at other shoes? [thinking: what do you want me to do then? Cut that part away?]

Customer: This shoe quite hard, huh? So different from that one (points to older version of the SAME shoe)
Me: It's the material of the shoe. Don't worry, after a while, it'll become softer.
Customer: But the shoe is very hard here. (points to area)
Me: ... [thinking: Did you just hear what I say?!]

See? Stupidity at its finest. I have now developed a grudging respect for all that work in the service line. If I ever said anything bad about them, I'm sorry. Because it's not your fault that many of the population are apparently foolish or have VERY selective hearing.

Gods, when are the results EVER going to appear?!

Labels: life, rant

Okay, so I was supposed to meet the girls at like 11:30, though I was still at home at that time. And yeah, I was late. However, even lateness did not save me from the ambush hug that they smothered me in when I arrived. No, it wasn't Aishah, it was instead Sab, Faza and Mei Qiao, and later Julitta. Right, so it has been like a month over since we last saw each other, hence, the outing. Where we swapped stories about the going-ons in our lives. Nothing very interesting from me, seeing how I merely slacked at home and mooched in front of the computer/tv/ds, while hoping my mother would treat me as invisible. But sadly, she didn't. And just like me (and every other mooching teens), Julitta too has the same problem. Sab's way luckier in the fact that her parents work the entire day, so she can mooch to her heart's content. Blah. I wish my mother would work more too. (*lightning strikes* how unfilial of me)

So yeah, we probably irritated the hell out of our fellow passengers on the train heading towards town.

The movie that we watched was Mission Sex Control, a Korean movie, which could have been good except that it tried too hard to smuggle in as much genres as possible. What started off as a comedic, light hearted show about a woman teaching villagers the pros of... family planning, aka, condoms and birth control pills, turned nasty and dramatic and sad and almost violent. Which frankly, weirds me out. Oh well.

Later, we spent quite a lot of money on arcade games that are frankly quite addictive. We sort of pooled our tokens together, in order to complete an entire game. Which I think was nearly 20 tokens in total from us all. And that's a lot of money for just one game!

After that, we went window shopping and ate junk food. Faza and I got this tub of ice cream and shared with the others, so yeah, gorged on ice cream. Can you just see the pounds that I'm plying on?!

Pity I couldn't have dinner with them, as my cousin was having her birthday dinner and I was required to attend. She turns 30 this year, old, no? Anyway, dinner was... very... reminiscent of a chinese wedding dinner. What with the suckling piglet and shark fin soup. It is also my shock and horror to find out that the 9 people spent about $500 on just dinner! Do you know how expensive that is?!

Yeah, returned home pretty late, about 10 plus, but it was a sort of fun day for me, wouldn't mind going out and having fun again. Except for the fact that my mother likes to nag at how useless I am, having fun outside, leaving her with chores at home. It's enough to drive a person mad. Oh wait, aren't I crazy already?

Labels: life, long post, movie

2007 is coming to a close, just like all the previous years that I have lived through. Nothing spectacular, nothing exactly impressive, so don't really expect fireworks to come shooting out of the sky.

Was this a fruitful, productive year? I don't really know. What sets it apart from the other years? Similarly, I don't know exactly. Time, hours and minutes, days and weeks, they come and pass. But am I still the same that I was yesterday, or will I still be the same tomorrow? I can't tell, but I am sure that nothing remains stagnant, and like the clear waters that I adore, I am ever changing, which is good, I think. Nothing is more useless than something that is unable/refuses to change. Perhaps that is something that I need to remember when I get angry.

Things that I should change about myself:
[1] My patience, or the lack of it.
Yeah, I get riled up every so often, especially when it comes to my mother nagging at me. I provoke easily, and I seriously HATE being criticized, unless you're a stranger or I'm not close to you because I don't give a flying fuck about what strangers think of me. See, I'm getting all aggressive just by thinking aloud in my head what to type. What's the point of meditation and calming exercises if you just get all worked up over little things?

[2] Procrastination in general
Okay, so I should act laziness to the list, but it's only natural to lump laziness with me already. Everyone and I mean everyone knows about this giant flaw. I've read in various magazines that people born in the Year of the Sheep are inclined to laziness, but perhaps I have been hit the worst. Oh well, can't change that, haha. Because I am tooooo lazy to try.
Seriously though, procrastination is the BIGGEST problem I have. It's not really that I lack motivation to work, but sometimes, well, okay, most of the time, I plan to work, but end up changing the plan because if you think about it, what's the point of working today when you need to work tomorrow too? Or is that just my own lazy philosophy? (laughs)

[3] Materialism
In simpler terms, I'm a selfish and greedy bastard and I ought to be shot so that my flesh can be given to cannibals so that I might actually be useful for once in my life. So many human desires and I'm not above to using underhanded methods to get my way.

[4] Play Nice
I should try to stop facing the days with scowls and more scowls. But it uses less muscles than punching someone Because even stupid people deserves to be smiled at before you crush them with the back of your pointy heel. Okay, fine, I don't really wear heels. You get the mental image and their shocked stupid faces. Can you imagine it?
Oh yeah, I said to play nice. Well, I can put in an effort, I am sure. Gods willing that they put in more effort in acquiring MORE brains. Not in the Sylar way, of course.

[5] Facades
Masks that we wear to face the world, masks that we wear to face our demons, and the masks that we wear to face our loved ones. And when we find that we can't recognize ourselves, we panic and we blame others and ourselves for being so fake, and we angst and we mope. Why can't they simply get the fact that perhaps we need these masks for something? Like we need clothes before we go out of the house, or even out of the bathroom because Singapore has some pretty damned modesty laws. Whatever, man.
I'm PROUD of the fact that I wear many masks, and many people don't even know who I truly am. Perhaps I don't too, though I do have a hint. And perhaps, looking back all the way to the past that Cancerians adore (because I am at least half) I never changed from that weak, snivelling brat with a too large heart for this world. And that's a giant leap of faith because I could be a total wolf tearing into human flesh like paper. (Darren Shan's Demonta influence. Just finished Blood Beast. Great book. Read it, damnit.)

[6] Faith in Humanity?
I am not exactly sure if I need that. Or if there really is goodness in strangers. See, that's why I need this.

[7] Determination
Because seriously, procrastination sometimes really do suck. And I want to change that.

Labels: life, rant

I know, I know.
it's not about the receiving, but the giving.
but I can't help it.
I'm an ordinary girl
living in a material world.
hence chances of me becoming materialistic is inevitable.
honestly, I'm 16, why on earth are people still giving me crappy stuff?
I feel like just repackaging them and sending these gifts off to others.
who might even like it.
or maybe just send it away too. [this has a higher possibility though]

a towel.
a pack of biscuits
a piggy bank, literally
a charm pendant.

... so what am I going to do with these?
santa claus, are you punishing me for doubting your existance or what?
blah.
christmas.
what a waste of a perfectly good gift-giving holiday.
this has been an utterly fruitless day.
now I have to wait till next year...

Labels: life, rant

I was sort of planning to rot away at home before the computer, as my previous plans had fallen through. I was supposed to go christmas shopping with my cousin, who because of her over protectiveness as a mother, could not leave her son's side for he was ill and she didn't trust her husband to take care of him properly. [phew, run-on line] And since I had declined Aishah's previous offer of going out to Escape, there wasn't really anything for me to do. Until Kimberley asked me if I wanted to go out. Hence, we decided to go get our ears pierced.

We sort of asked around, on where to get the deed done, but few could answer. My mother couldn't give much helpful information as hers was done by her own mother, with a needle cleansed with a flame and lots and lots of alcohol. That must be painful. ]

Anyway, we headed to Orchard in the end, and finally had it done by a jewellery shop. It cost me like $80, for titanium earrings and 2 bottles of... solution. Ouch indeed, I mean, if I went to those cheapo shops, I could have gotten what, 8 earrings? Oh well. Safety first. Or so they say.

Kimberley's were much more expensive, over $100, for she had gotten white gold. Which I didn't like, I mean, gold, whenever yellow gold or white gold, doesn't really suit me.

The procedure:
[1] sit down on the stool and fill in your particulars on a form handed to you by the person in charge. if under 18, let your guardian/parent sign the form.
[2] wait patiently as the salesperson cleanse your ear with alcohol.
[3] let her spray mentholated spirit and watch as she marks your ears with a marker.
[4] watch in apprehension as she inches closer with the 'stapler thing', towards your ears.
[5] and roll your eyes when she finally pierces the ears as it barely hurt at all.
[6] mentally breathe a sigh of relief.

Look, I was really nervous about the whole ear piercing issue because several of my aunts had their ears infected and it really hurt, and I still remembered the tale that Jia Xuan told me before, about she screaming her head off. Blah. It also didn't help that I went first. And how painful is the actual piercing? Just like stapling yourself accidentally. So yeah, that mine was all painless, made me really glad.

After that, we went to watch a movie. As it was still early, so why not? We had wanted to watch Enchanted which Kimberley said it was really good for she watched it again and wanted to rewatch it. But, the earliest show was at 9, so we couldn't watch it. Instead we ended up watching Mr Magorium's Wonder Emporium.

The storyline... is barely there, and the themes of the show was seriously cliche, and too overused. Although the actors are good, the movie was still quite a flop. Dustin Hoffman was good in his role as Mr Magorium, an eccentric quirky old man who despite his age, was not jaded by the world and delights in delighting children. However, at the age of 243, he feels that his time is up, hence he decides to leave his store to Molly Mahoney, played by Natalie Portman. I think she was really good in here, and her image reminded me of Twiggy, her short cropped hair.
Molly was shocked for she had wanted to quit her job and pursue her career in music, and tries to get Mr Magorium to stay by showing him the joys of life. Adamantly, the man still decides to depart in the end. He died. With his death, and Molly's inability to believe in herself, the store loses its color and glory and magic, and in the end, Molly decides to sell it off. However, Eric, who too works at the store despite being only 9, turns to the other worker, Henry and gets him to help. Henry then helps Molly see that the magic of the store comes from her, and gets her to believe in herself. And hence, the store was saved in the end.

Seriously, the movie was boring, for one that's geared to children. I wouldn't believe that normal children would be interested, other than those precocious and too mature kids. Right. Because Kimberley's sisters were all bored by it.

Labels: life, movie

... my room scares me. >.< I feel like just throwing everything away, but curse this stupid sentimentality of mine that makes it hard for me to just dispose of all these... blah

Ah yes, sort of came clean with the mangas. Though there are still plenty from where it came from.


Please buy my comics? Lol.


Yup, the floor is equally messy as well... don't know how am I going to walk/wade through this mess...


Yes... stopped living in denial; there is something wrong with the computer. I just don't know what. At the moment.


... Instead of 3 bags of wool, I have 3 bags of rubbish. Ah well. This is Singapore, what would I be doing with wool?
My plant is dying >.< I'm bad with living things. Period.

I started massive cleaning on November 8. It's the 10, and it's still bad... Gods. I hate spring cleaning. Reeally.
But all books and papers have been cleaned out, ready to be given to some other people that will be mugging. Not really, since many of them are in the IP system or something.

Labels: life

Labels: freetalk, life

Labels: life, writing

Went all the way to Braddell today... one of my mother's friend just came back from the hospital after a major operation. I've known her for quite long, almost all my life, and she's a really nice person, so cheerful and so vibrant. So it really quite sad to see her looking pale and tired, and way thinner than before. Before she was quite plump, and had a loud jovial voice. Now, she seemed to have dropped at least 10 kg and could hardly speak any louder than needed.

Due to some illness or something, she had to remove her womb and because she had a allergic cough, the wound hurt every time she coughed or sneezed. Even laughing was painful; I could see it when she laughed softly and had to clutch at her stomach, pained.

And it's really quite worrisome because she's currently living on her own as her son's in Australia studying, and her husband's in Myanmar working. All she has is her sister-in-law who would come every afternoon bringing her lunch and accompanying her until evening before she has to leave to take care of her own home.

Blessed be. Even though she's Christian and probably wouldn't believe in the Goddess and God, more blessings wouldn't hurt anyone...

Labels: life, people

Woke up at about 6:50 and got ready for the yoga sessions at Pure Yoga over at Ngee Ann City. For some reason, the aunties decided to travel all the way to Orchard by bus, 190. >.> Stupid or what? The journey took about an hour, including waiting time, and traffic jams.

We reached there at about 9, meeting our dear instructor Dagge at the same time. She helped us with the admin stuff, the registrations and the lockers thing.

Pure Yoga occupies the entire 18th floor of Ngee Ann City Tower A, including bathing facilities and cosy corners. Incense is burned almost all the time, I think. They should also include soothing piped in music and more reading materials. The decor was modern and minimalistic, using very plain and earthy tones. There were plenty of showers, more 20 plus, I think, and lockers that are easy to use. Hair dryers and towels are also available. In fact, there wasn't anything except a change of clothes that we needed to bring. Mats were provided automatically.

I think that there are rooms specially built for the Hot Flow style of yoga which requires temperatures between 30 and 40. Which I experienced today. It was totally killer, I tell you. I was perspiring really badly even though the movements were simple and I have done them before.

After two sessions of yoga, one Hatha and the other Hot Flow, I went to use the bathing facilities. Kind of like swimming pools' showers, only classier. The shampoos and soaps provided were lousy though... but can't really complain when I'm not paying a single cent. Yup, the entire experience was free, thanks to Dagge who got all of us in as a free trial session.


After that, I had lunch at Wistma Atria, Food Republic... finding seats during lunchtime was tough, but when you have luck... Anyway, I had actually wanted to head to the library after that, but I was too tired and headed home.

Only to find that there wasn't anyone at home and I had no key... luckily my mother was heading home and took only like 15 min to reach home, so I waited. Apparently, the air con thing was unsuccessful, because of some problems as to how the house was built, so she had to go to IMM and get the deposit back. She then headed to Jurong West to some other air con store or something. My brother went with her, then after the air con fiasco, headed to Suntec for gods know what.

Labels: life

Plenty of spoilers bound ahead. Read at your own risk. Or blame your eyes for being too active. But we've all read the book anyway, right?

I woke up quite early today, not because I was particularly excited about today, but because I haven't quite finished my tuition homework, and she was coming at 10. Scary, no? Anyway, yeah, could hardly listen to what she was teaching today, my mind was busy wandering off. Yeah, had an erm... very early birthday celebration today, since 23/7 happens to be a weekday, and my family's not free. Busy schedules all of us. My arse.

Reached the Cathay at like, 1:45, but there wasn't anything to eat... we haven't had lunch, since tuition ended at 12 plus, and then movie started at 2:30. So, we walked around a bit, nice place, but kind of quiet, not bustling with people, various shops barely opened. Lunch was well... overpriced. Seriously, a hotdog and a drink cost $7 plus? Way overpriced.

The entire cinema was packed with people, full house and all that. And the theater was pretty large, definitely larger then the usual. So, settled in with a drink and food. We sat back and relaxed.

Rant begins here. You are warned.
The movie... too hurried, lacks finesse, could be more subtle, was a little anti climatic. All that schmoosh and stuff. You know, in the book, Potter's hair was messy and uncontrollable. In fanon, aka fanfictions, his hair was messy in a sexy way, you know, post shag hair. So why, oh why is his hair in the movies atrocious and just downright ugly?! Ron... he was never good looking whether in the book, fanon or movie. So who cares. Hermione, good for her that she's looking pretty. Someone has to, when the other leads aren't dashing enough. Now, moving to Malfoy, in the book, he looks pointed and sharp. In fanon, he was Slytherin Sex God and Ice Prince. In the blasted movies... he looks like a bloody toad prince. >.> Granted, there isn't enough scenes of him anyway. Umbridge should get a bloody award for her brilliant performance as a... gods, I can't think of a milder word then bitch. >.> Yeah, and Helena Bonham Carter was pretty good... she reminds me of a female Jack Sparrow. Haha. The way she moves with that drunken gait. Dudley, surprisingly, with all that fats, could run quite fast. Ah, fear, the motivating factor. Congratulations to Mr Dursley, he looks more and more like a pig as the movies progresses. And Petunia, I'm sorry for seeing her in that horrendous outfit that she wore in her few scenes.

Spoilers begin here.
Sirius's death wasn't at all sad for me. I know he dies, but the movie couldn't convey the sadness of his death, nor could it bring out Harry's hatred towards Bellatrix. The young version of Severus was kind of cute, in a puppy dog way. So much better than the Snape we have a love-hate relationship with. The scene with Umbridge was priceless, and they should have added in the scene McGonagall had with Umbridge. Overall, I didn't feel Harry's anger at being left out, at being ignored. In the book, during confrontations, there were plenty of capslock used, but few were felt in the movie.

Grittier? Not exactly, the book wasn't too dark or moody, at least, I have read much worse. The scene with Cho Chang was bad... just damn annoying. And she wasn't the sneak... >.< However, the fact was that when I read the book, I can sympathize with everything that's going on, but the movie lacks that factor, that the infallible Harry Potter is actually human inside and out.

Voldemort... ugly as usual, was boring. I didn't particularly feel worried about Potter's health. Lucius and his bunch of stupid Death Eaters looked like overgrown playground bullies. >.<>.> I liked Luna though, but she could be more dreamy, more off in her world.

Ah well, sixth movie, more of Draco. Please, movie producers and stylists, even if you don't wanna turn him into Slytherin Sex God/Ice Prince, can we please then stick to the canon look?! And more on Severus as well. Yay. I kind of dread the last book, even though I am looking forward to it. Is it very contradicting? Frankly, I don't know if I want Harry to live after all. Or do I even want him to be a good guy. >.> I kind of wish to see him all powerful and living it up. Shaking away Dumbledore and all that.

End spoilers. End rant. It's safe to stop peeking from behind your eyes now.
Dinner was good, we walked to Plaza Singapura and since it was for my birthday, I was allowed to choose. Swensen's was it, since I have never really eaten there before. Seriously. We usually go for Japanese cuisine. Yeah well, change is good.

I had lamb, which was darn good, since I haven't had it for ages, more than a year in fact. I also had a root beer float and a bit of ice cream. The bill was scary though, $70 plus. Luckily, I'm not the one paying. Heh. So yeah, walked around a bit, even though it would hardly take off a bit of the weight that I would gain from that meal. Good day, all in all, but no mugging was done. Procrastinate on, procrastinate on. Sigh.

Labels: family, life, movie

Money is a medium of exchange that humans have conceived in order to effectively barter with each other without arguing over the values of items. Usually in the forms of coins and notes, they have no real value until humans give them a particular value that is recognized by all. So in some way, money is results of one's labor; you exchange money in return for goods that are made from someone's efforts and time.

Why is money considered the root of all evil? Evilness, as an adjective, is to be morally wrong; to be wicked. As a noun, it means harm, misfortune and mischief. Perhaps both definitions can be used. The idea of having money may motivate others to commit crimes that are... evil. However, it must be noted that why does the idea of money makes people do evil? It all boils down to human desire; the desire to be as rich as others, coveting someone's possessions, jealousy over status. These are all human desires, which just points out that money cannot be the root of all evil, it is merely the form that tempts people to do evil. Instead, it is us humans that are the cause; due to the lack of self control over one's desires, we are unable to differentiate right and wrong, and commit crimes to satisfy ourselves.

Of course, it is unlikely that we will be able to rid ourselves of all desires, that would just be plain freaky because we can't all be attaining nirvana suddenly. Anyway, as inanimate objects, money cannot be considered evil, perhaps as a tool for evil-doers, but because objects have no value until they are given a value, it can't be evil. Which points out that human desires are actually the motivators behind crimes.

And yes, officially, this has made no sense, and I'm just basically repeating myself. >.> No, it has no point, I was merely bored and decided to write this in retaliation to what I had seen on my cousin's blog.

Labels: life

I think I've lost sight of myself.
Or maybe I never did know myself in the first place.
Too many masks to wear and now,
the reflection is blurry with unshed tears.


I think I hate it the most when people say that they can't stand others that act/behave in a certain manner. To wear some sort of a mask, to behave in a particular manner, however flimsy the mask, however similar the behavior, isn't that the price we pay for society? Doesn't social graces expect us to act in a certain way in order not to embarrass ourselves and others?

People also put on masks because they don't want to reveal everything to just everyone. Aren't there aspects of your personality that you wouldn't show to random strangers? Don't you treat different people differently? It's like, you wouldn't treat your family the same way you treat people on the streets, right? The masks that one wears show how much trust they have in others. It's just a form of self protection, to be wary of others.

Personally, I wear many masks, act differently around different people, but it all boils down to the fact that I'm still who I am, snarky and sarcastic and mean and all that crap. I just show different aspects of my personality because after all, I'm a living human being and not some two dimensional character. I think the most important thing is to not lose the you behind the mask, because at the end of the day, fuck society and all that, the world can hang itself for all I care, I just want to be who I was, who I am, and who I will be.

Labels: life, musings, random